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就今天， 让我看开很多事。
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Okaes, I really have nothing to do to blog like 2.30am. Just the Korean drama and I'm like, "WA DAMN HAWT SIO AND SO SILLY ABOUT LOVE SOMEMORE. DAMN I WANT THIS TYPE OF GUYS!!" Well, now I'm just like any typical dreamy girls. I'm like starting to laugh at myself, for I guess I did lost all hope in guys previously and now I'm gawking at these guys. -.- You know, the kind of contradictions of being cheated by guys and having sorta problems going on relationships, the next moment you enter her dreams, you see her drooling over HAWTT guys. Zzzzzz. Lame rights. But I guess it's just like what all girls are, no matter how many times you get hurt during the journey of love, you would never give up the hope of meeting a perfect one. Meh. I think I would never give up the hope of meeting a hawtt guy. Just like the qing wa wang zi bai jin nu. Hahaha. I know it's just so lame but whatever. I wanna go Kbox and Gloria Jeans. No money lehx. Zzzz.
It's liked so fucked up. I'm still the same from all these years. So weak that I didn't even realise how i felt these two years. I'm just swaying between sudden thoughts. I liked someone I wouldn't say and I just hid it beneath for so long. For I hid it too long that I didn't realise it till I looked at our past conversations. -.- Fuck I'm such a idiot. Fuck the angel and devil. Just stop messing me up. Now the devil 60%, angel 30% and myself 10%. I know this is crap. But you won't know if you don't understand me. I'm just so messed up. Forget it. If I didn't grasp the things that I ought to do when the time was right, what rights do I have to take it now? Just take it I'm the bitch but whatever. I won't ask for anything. I just ask for us to be normal, back to the old times. I swayed between so much thoughts that I think I'm gonna go berserk. For once, I wanted to be honest with my feelings but I could not. HAHA. How hilarious. For once I'm such a bitch and now I'm like a pathetic puppy weeping here. Fuck it. Damn how stupid can I get. RAWR. I really need to go and become a nun for 3 months to clear up my thoughts. -.- Look, I need that crying again. I need to cry like there's tomorrow again. I cannot find anyway to vent my frustrations again, with much power I think. Cuz I think dancing and singing is jux not enough. I really need something to make me cry but I cannot find. It's like I just wanna cry out loud but I can't. I can even suppress how I cry and I'm amazed. Bwah. Whatever. idlu
Okay, this is gonna be a shit entry as all of it will be talking about my dad. I'm really frustrated with the way he is. Really I am. No one can be any lazier than this. He took the papers and came to my face, show me the lottery tickets and ask me to check for him while I was playing Audition. I know I can be a little temperamental when I play Audition. It's not like he's blind or what and he have numerous spetacles catering to the needs of his eyes. I was like, "WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? SEE WHAT?"